
Chapter One: The Glass Trophy
“We climb the tallest glass towers to touch the sky, only to realize we can no longer feel the earth beneath our feet.”
Welcome to my story.
It was supposed to be that day of my life where I thought nothing would make me happier, but as I sat there, just minutes away from receiving my 5-year long-service felicitation award, absolutely nothing excited me.
The grand banquet hall of the hotel was bathed in warm amber light. Around me, dozens of round tables were filled with laughing colleagues, dressed in sharp suits and elegant silk sarees, clinking crystal glasses. But the real guests of honor weren’t the employees; it was their families. The front rows were filled with proud parents. Mothers wearing their best Kanjeevaram sarees, fathers adjusting their unfamiliar suit jackets, their eyes gleaming with pride as their children were called onto the brightly lit stage.
I sat at Table 14. Alone.
The heavy air-conditioning felt like ice against my skin. I stared down at the empty chair next to me. My phone buzzed in my pocket, a habit I couldn’t break. I pulled it out. It was a work email. Even today, they couldn’t let it go.
Just two days ago, after working day and night, pulling 14-hour shifts to deliver a major project, I missed one small detail in a meeting. I lost my attention for just two minutes. The result? A harsh, three-paragraph email from my senior manager, questioning my “dedication and focus,” CC’d to the entire leadership team.
Looking at that email now, sitting in this glittering room, a heavy lump formed in my throat. I had given five years of my youth, my sleep, and my peace to this company, and the moment I slipped up, I was just a liability.
And then, my mind drifted to her.
Vanasmitha. My Amma.
I thought about how many times I had been completely inattentive to her. I thought about the days she would stand by my desk in our Electronic City apartment, gently holding a plate of hot food, asking me to eat. Ten minutes later, she would come back with the exact same plate, asking the exact same question, having completely forgotten she was just there.
And what did she get in return? Did I stop typing to look at her confused eyes? No. She was fed only by my angry tone, snapping at her to stop repeating herself and just leave. When she got disoriented trying to find the elevator on our own floor, I didn’t hold her hand. I yelled at her for embarrassing me in front of the neighbors. I was too busy looking at my screens to notice that my mother’s mind was slowly disappearing right in front of me.
I was giving my 100% to people who would replace me tomorrow, and I gave 0% to the only woman who treated me like I was her entire universe. And because of that blind arrogance, one afternoon, she simply pushed open the front door I had forgotten to latch, stepped out into the dizzying maze of the city, and vanished. Today is exactly 273 days since my Amma went missing.
“And now, for five years of relentless dedication,” the HR Director’s voice boomed through the speakers, pulling me out of my guilt. “Please put your hands together for our Senior Software Architect Vihar!”
The applause erupted. It was loud, polite, and completely hollow.
I stood up, forced an empty smile, and walked toward the stage. The VP handed me a heavy, sharp-edged glass trophy. As I turned to face the audience for the photograph, the camera flashed. My eyes went completely blind with white light. For a split second in that blinding flash, all I could see was my Amma’s smiling face.
When my vision finally cleared, I looked at the front row. A junior developer from my team was standing there, hugging his elderly mother. She was crying, patting his back with trembling hands.
My breath caught in my throat. I looked down at the cold, transparent glass trophy in my hands. This was it. This was what I traded her for.
I didn’t return to Table 14. I walked straight down the side stairs, bypassed the dining area, and pushed through the heavy doors into the dimly lit, quiet corridor of the hotel. I placed the glass trophy on a nearby decorative table. It meant nothing. I would have traded every promotion just to hear her call me ‘kanda’ (child) one more time.
“You left your award behind.”
I turned. Standing a few feet away was Meera. She was the newest junior developer on my team. While the rest of the team was busy networking inside, she had quietly followed me out. She was wearing a simple cotton saree, a familiar weave that almost exactly resembled the ones my Amma used to wear. Her eyes were observing me with a quiet, unsettling depth.
“It’s just glass, Meera,” I said, my voice rough, turning my gaze to the floor. “It’s heavy, and it breaks easily.”
She stepped closer. The office knew me as the ruthless, silent architect who never smiled. But Meera was looking at me like she was reading my soul.
“We run so fast chasing what we think is a dream, Vihar,” she said softly. “Only to finally hold the award and realize that the real destination was never the trophy… it was the people we left behind on the journey.”
I froze, my corporate armor cracking instantly. How did she know?
Before I could ask, she offered a small, sad smile, turned around, and walked back toward the banquet hall, leaving me alone with the quiet hum of the corridor and the crushing weight of my own regrets.
“We spend our lives chasing a destination we think is everything, only to realize the journey meant nothing without the ones who walked it with us.”
Chapter Two: The Echo in the Courtyard
“They say if you search for someone long enough, you start seeing them everywhere. But what they don’t tell you is how much you want it to be reality for at least once.”
Have you ever been surrounded by the deafening noise of a city, but all you can actually hear is the silence of one missing person?
That was my life now. Every Saturday and Sunday, I drove my car to the dusty outskirts of the city. Sticking on missing person posters over and over, the same poster, only to realize my hopes were getting dumped.
I would walk into old age homes, ashrams, and government shelters. I would stand at the reception, pull out a crumpled yellow flyer with my Amma’s photo on it, and ask the same desperate question: “Excuse me, have you seen her?”
There is no week I have not called the police station, only to hear the exact same response: No lead.
It was a Sunday evening, and the sky had turned that melancholic monsoon grey. I had just walked out of ‘Shanthi Nivas’, a small ashram near Kengeri. Another dead end. I was walking slowly toward my car, feeling the familiar, crushing weight of defeat, when I heard it.
A song.
A faint, crackling melody drifting from the open courtyard at the back of the ashram.
“Baanigondu yelle yelle ide… Ninnasegelli kone ide…” (Is there a boundary to the sky anywhere? Where is the end to your desires?)
My hand froze on the car door. My breath hitched. That was Dr. Rajkumar’s voice. But more importantly, that was her song. It was the exact tune Amma used to hum while making akki rotti back in our ancestral home in Sirsi.
For a second, my heart pounded so fast I thought it would crack my ribs. Did she wander in here? Did she finally remember her favorite melody?
I didn’t think. I just ran. I pushed past the rusted iron gates, my shoes crunching loudly against the wet gravel, tracing the music to the back of the building.
“Amma!” I gasped, turning the corner.
But it wasn’t her.
Sitting on a low stone bench, holding a small Bluetooth speaker, was Meera. She was wearing a simple yellow kurti, surrounded by a few elderly women. When she heard my voice, she turned, her smile fading as she took in my wide, desperate eyes.
The music stopped. The sudden silence was deafening.
The mirage shattered, and with it, my hope died all over again. The exhaustion of 287 days crashed into my legs. I didn’t say a word to her. I couldn’t. I just walked over to a nearby stone bench and collapsed onto it, burying my face in my hands.
Meera didn’t ask what I was doing there. She didn’t offer empty pity. I heard her footsteps walk away, and a few minutes later, she returned. She quietly sat next to me and held out a small steel cup of hot filter coffee.
I reached out blindly and took it.
The moment my bare fingers touched the searing hot steel, I flinched. The sudden heat burned my skin but the memory it triggered burned my soul even worse.
I stared at the hot steel cup, and suddenly, I wasn’t in the ashram anymore. I was right back in my Electronic City apartment, on a rainy evening just a few months before she disappeared.
I was sitting at my glass dining table, typing furiously on my laptop, my mind buried in some meaningless code. Amma had walked out of the kitchen holding a small, aged brass tumbler filled with piping hot coffee. She held it out to me. Absent-mindedly, my eyes still glued to the screen, I grabbed it.
The searing heat of the brass burned my palm. I dropped it instantly. The tumbler clattered, spilling hot coffee all over the expensive floor.
“Amma, what is this?!” I yelled, my voice dripping with anger. “It is so hot! Can’t you just get it in a normal ceramic cup with a handle like everyone else? Why do you have to use this?”
Amma stood there, looking down at the spilled coffee with a deeply lost expression. She didn’t argue. She touched her forehead with a trembling hand, looking around the ultra-modern kitchen as if she suddenly didn’t recognize where she was.
“I… I was looking for the porch,” she murmured, her voice terrified and confused. “It was your Appa’s brass glass, kanda. In Sirsi, your Appa and I used to sit on the porch in the evening… I brought it for him. I mean… I brought it for you. I just wanted to sit with you and drink coffee like that again.”
I hadn’t even looked at her confusion. I hadn’t noticed the fear in her eyes as her fading mind blurred her past and her present. I had just sighed, annoyed at the mess and what I thought was just her ‘rambling’, and put my noise-canceling headphones back on. I shut her out.
Sitting on the stone bench next to Meera, the memory finally broke me. A tear slipped down my cheek, dropping onto the hot steel cup in my hand.
“She just wanted to drink coffee with me,” I whispered, my voice cracking.
I looked at Meera, and for the first time since my mother went missing, I poured my heart out. I told this junior from my office everything. About the brass glass. About the anger. About how I ignored the only person who wanted to spend time with me.
Meera sat in absolute silence, listening to my confession. She didn’t judge me. When my tears finally stopped, she gently looked down at the crumpled yellow flyer sticking out of my pocket.
“I volunteer here on weekends,” Meera said quietly, her eyes gently studying the photo of my mother. “I do social work with a few NGOs, Vihar. We have a whole network of ashrams and shelters across Karnataka. We have WhatsApp groups dedicated to finding missing persons.”
She looked up, her eyes meeting mine with a grounded, unbreakable certainty. “I will help you find her. You don’t have to look for her alone anymore.”
“A burned hand heals in a few days, but the guilt of rejecting the warmth someone brought you lasts a lifetime.”
Chapter Three: The Arrogance of Grief
“Pain is a very selfish emotion. It builds a wall around us, convincing us that we are the only ones suffering.”
Have you ever noticed how tragedy makes us incredibly arrogant? When your heart is breaking, you look at people laughing at a tea stall, or families joking in a mall, and you secretly hate them. You think, How can they smile when my world is ending? But we completely fail to realize that when we were happily living our perfect little lives, climbing our corporate ladders, we never once paused to understand or care about the stranger crying on the pavement. Grief makes hypocrites out of all of us.
I was drowning in that exact arrogance.
If you had ever seen my Amma, you would understand what I lost. She was such a simple woman. She always wore these soft, faded cotton sarees that smelled faintly of camphor, a small maroon bindi, and a tiny gold nose pin. But her smile was always brighter than that nose pin, and her eyes held more stories than she ever spoke. She didn’t have a big, loud presence, but just looking at her felt like stepping into a warm house after a cold storm.
It was Day 315. For a month, Meera had been my silent anchor. That Sunday, we drove three hours to a government hospital in Tumkur. Someone on one of her WhatsApp groups had reported seeing an elderly woman matching Amma’s description wandering near the bus stand. Over the last ten months, I had received so many fake calls, cruel scammers demanding money, or people sending me on wild goose chases just for a reward that my patience was already worn down to a raw nerve. I drove like a madman, my heart in my throat, praying this wasn’t another cruel joke.
But when we reached the ward… it wasn’t her.
It was just another elderly woman, abandoned by her own children, staring blankly at the peeling green paint of the hospital wall.
The moment I realized it wasn’t Amma, my frustration boiled over. “It’s a dead end, Meera. Let’s go,” I said, already walking toward the door.
But Meera didn’t follow me. Instead, she sat down next to the woman. She spent the next two hours filling out government forms, calling a local ashram, and arranging an auto to drop the lady off so she wouldn’t sleep on the street. I stood near the hospital gate, pacing and irritated to my core. I felt like I was wasting precious time. Every minute spent on this stranger felt like a minute stolen from my search for my own mother.
The drive back to Bangalore was suffocating. The monsoon had started, turning the sky a dark, angry grey. I was gripping the steering wheel so tightly my knuckles ached. The disappointment of another false lead, combined with my irritation, was turning into a dark, toxic rage.
“We will find a better lead next week, Vihar,” Meera said quietly from the passenger seat. “The network is expanding “
I snapped.
I hit the brakes, pulling the car roughly onto the muddy shoulder of the highway. I shoved the door open and stepped out into the cold drizzle. My hands were shaking so badly I could barely pull a crushed cigarette box and a cheap lighter from my pocket, something I had impulsively bought at a highway toll booth a few days ago but hadn’t dared to open until now. I hadn’t smoked in years, but the anxiety was eating me alive.
I put one between my trembling lips and struggled to light it in the wind. I heard the passenger door open. Meera stepped out, opening a black umbrella and quietly holding it over my head to protect me and the flickering lighter flame from the rain.
That simple act of kindness only made me angrier.
“Stop it, Meera! Just stop!” I yelled, my voice vibrating over the sound of the rain. “Stop treating my mother like one of your weekend NGO projects! It’s easy for you to sit there, fill out forms for strangers, and give me positive quotes! At the end of the day, you get to go back to your life. What do you know about this pain? What do you know about the guilt of not having your mother waiting for you at home?”
I stood there in the mud, completely broken, taking a shaky drag of my cigarette. I expected Meera to throw the umbrella at me and walk away. I deserved it.
But Meera didn’t move. She didn’t look angry. She just looked at me with a profound, quiet sorrow.
“You’re right, Vihar,” she said, her voice barely a whisper against the storm. “I don’t know what it is like to have a mother waiting for me at home. Because I never had one. She passed away when I was a baby.”
My anger instantly evaporated. A cold wave washed over my chest.
Meera looked down at the wet asphalt, a single tear mixing with the rain on her face. “I don’t even remember how she called me. Did she say my name? Did she call me ‘Putta’? I don’t know. My mind is completely blank when it comes to her voice. I only ever knew a mother’s love through my Appa. He was my father, my mother, my entire world.”
She looked back up at me, her eyes carrying a weight that shattered my arrogance. “Three years ago, he had a massive heart attack. I didn’t just lose my Appa that day, Vihar. My entire world shattered. The only person who waited for me, the only person who cared if I ate or slept… I knew he wouldn’t be there tomorrow. I was twenty-two, entirely alone in this world, sitting in a dark room.”
I couldn’t breathe. I just stared at her, feeling like the absolute worst human being on the planet.
“I could have spent my life sobbing in that room,” she said softly. “Instead, I went to the ashrams. Every time an ajji holds my hand, I get a fraction of the love I was robbed of. I didn’t have a mother, so I went and found fifty of them. That is why I didn’t leave that woman in the hospital today. And that is why I am helping you.”
The heavy silence of the highway wrapped around us. I looked at this girl, carrying a mountain of grief, who had chosen to turn her shattered pieces into a shelter for others. I had been so proud of my corporate titles, but I knew absolutely nothing about true strength.
“I am so sorry,” I whispered, the cigarette burning down to my fingers. “I am so, so sorry.”
Meera gave a small, gentle nod. She looked down at my hand.
“Put that cigarette away, Vihar,” she said softly, a tiny, warm smile breaking through the heaviness of the moment. “We will find her. And when we do, Amma will definitely not like a son with weak lungs.”
“The most beautiful souls in the world are not the ones who have never been broken; they are the ones who use their broken pieces to heal the wounds of strangers.”
Chapter Four: The Dust of Belonging
“Have you ever returned to a place you fought so hard to escape, only to realize it was the only place you ever lived?”
It was Day 342.
It was a Friday evening at the office. The entire floor was practically empty, everyone having rushed off to start their weekend. I was sitting in the cafeteria, staring blankly at a cold cup of coffee. Meera walked in, carrying her laptop bag, and sat quietly across from me. She didn’t ask if I was okay. She already knew the answer.
“Meera,” I broke the silence, my voice hollow. “Amma always believed in the Sirsi Marikamba temple. Every year she used to ask me, ‘Kanda, take me to Marikamba once. I want to offer my prayers.’ And every year, I gave her the same corporate excuse. ‘Next sprint, Amma. Next quarter. I don’t have leave.’ I kept ignoring her.”
I looked up at her, a sudden, desperate urge gripping my chest. “I need to go there. Even if she isn’t there, I need to stand in front of that deity and ask for forgiveness.”
Meera didn’t hesitate for a single second. “I’ll drive.”
By Saturday afternoon, we were deep inside the Western Ghats. The sky had initially turned an angry purple, pouring down rain in violent sheets, but as we drove deeper into the Malnad belt, the storm finally exhausted itself. The heavy clouds parted, letting the golden afternoon sun spill over the forest.
I rolled down the passenger window. The cold, earthy wind hit my face, smelling of crushed leaves and wet soil. Every single leaf on the towering Areca trees looked as though it carried expensive, glistening pearls on its tip. I closed my eyes, letting the breeze wash over me. It felt exactly like my Amma’s breath soft, comforting, and deeply familiar.
Suddenly, Meera slammed on the brakes. The car jerked to a halt.
She looked ahead, confused and frustrated. The road was completely blocked. A massive tree had fallen across the highway during the storm, and a long line of vehicles was already jammed ahead of us, going nowhere.
I opened my eyes, looked at the standstill, and turned to her. “Take this left,” I said, pointing to a narrow, muddy dirt track completely hidden between thick bushes.
Meera slowed the car, looking at the overgrown thicket with doubt. “Are you sure, Vihar? There’s no board. It doesn’t even look like a road.”
“I know these roads by heart,” I whispered.
She turned the wheel, and the car crawled down the unpaved track until a large, traditional wooden gate appeared. We stepped out into the quiet, sun-washed forest.
There it stood. The classic Thotti Mane with its heavy sloping tiled roof, thick rosewood pillars, and central open courtyard. The exterior paint had peeled off, washed away by years of harsh monsoons, but the sheer charm and soul of the house remained perfectly intact. It had been locked and abandoned ever since my father died and I brought Amma to the city.
I walked up to the heavy wooden doors. The rusted iron lock hung there, looking like a stubborn guardian. I picked up a heavy, jagged stone from the ground and struck it. Clang! It didn’t budge. I hit it again, harder. That lock was so strong; it felt as though it was holding back all the emotions and memories I had trapped inside myself for years. With one final, desperate scream, I smashed the stone down. The lock broke with a sharp snap, echoing in the dead silence of the forest.
We pushed the heavy doors open and stepped inside.
The air was thick with the smell of damp wood, dust, and old memories. Dead leaves had blown in through the open courtyard, scattering across the stone floor. I looked up at the ceiling. Among the red clay roof tiles, there were a few glass tiles placed perfectly to let the natural light in. Since the sun had just come out, a single, misty beam of pale golden light was cutting beautifully through the dusty darkness of the room. It was pure nostalgia.
I walked slowly through the dark, empty rooms, my chest tightening with every step. I stood near the courtyard, looking at the old, vintage wooden rocking chair sitting quietly in the corner. The exact spot where my Appa used to sit.
“He never let me settle for simple, Meera,” I whispered, staring at the empty chair. “Appa knew I was too attached to my mother. He used to scold me, saying, ‘Amman sergu hidkond suthadbeda’ (Don’t wander around holding your mother’s saree pallu). He always told me I had my own wings, that I shouldn’t be a bird who just rests in its parents’ nest. That was why I fought so desperately to leave this place. I wanted to escape his strict rules. But standing here now… I realised he wasn’t trying to cage me. He was just making me grounded and strong enough to survive the world.”
I walked towards the kitchen entrance and stopped. There it was. The olle the traditional mud hearth. Cold, cracked, and covered in spider webs.
Standing there in the silence, I suddenly heard it. A phantom melody echoing through the empty, dusty halls of the house, playing vividly in my mind.
“Baanigondu yelle yelle ide… Ninnasegelli kone ide…”
My knees finally gave out. I broke down. I collapsed onto the dusty floor, the weight of the last 342 days crushing my spine. I started to cry loud, agonizing sobs that echoed through the empty house.
Meera knelt down beside me. She didn’t care about the thick dust ruining her clothes. She gently pulled me toward her, making me rest my heavy head on her lap. Her fingers slowly began to stroke my hair.
The moment her hand touched my head, the rhythm of her fingers sent me spiraling back to a memory I had completely forgotten. It was a Sunday evening in my Electronic City apartment. I had returned from work with a severe, blinding headache. I was lying on the sofa when Amma quietly walked over, lifted my head, placed it gently on her lap, and began to massage my temples.
“Your Appa always found this to be the best remedy for his headaches,” she had said softly.
I scoffed, my eyes closed in frustration. “What else can we expect, Amma? He gave us enough headaches by being so strict. He always wanted to push me out so I could fly like a bird. Well, look at me now. In Bangalore, I am flying.”
Amma had smiled that gentle, tired smile of hers and continued stroking my hair.
“Fly freely? Are you sure, kanda?” she had asked softly, pointing her finger toward our premium apartment balcony. “Look out there. You have a tall, netted balcony so pigeons don’t come in. The sky is blocked by tall glass buildings and live current wires. You work day and night in a closed room, bringing home headaches instead of peace. When your Appa told you not to rest in our nest, he didn’t mean for you to go build a golden cage for yourself. He wanted you to fly in the open sky, to feel the wind, to know where the ground is so you can always land safely. He didn’t want you to forget your soil.”
Lying there in the dust of my old home, with Meera stroking my hair, the absolute truth of Amma’s words finally shattered my arrogance. I always thought I had flown free into the sky, but it turned out I had only caged my own sky.
Suddenly, the sharp ping of a phone notification broke the silence.
Meera reached into her pocket. The network was terribly weak, but a message had managed to push through on her NGO WhatsApp group. I felt her body go completely still.
“Vihar,” she whispered, her voice trembling.
I sat up and looked at the screen. It was a blurry photo, taken from a distance by a local. But I didn’t need a high-resolution lens. I saw the faded green cotton saree. I saw the way she wrapped the pallu tightly around her frail shoulders. And I saw that small, maroon bindi.
I read the caption beneath the photo: Elderly woman sitting on the temple steps since yesterday, humming Kannada songs.
I looked closely at the background of the image. The towering stone pillars, the distinct wooden chariot in the corner. My heart stopped beating.
“Meera,” I breathed out, completely stunned. “That is the Sirsi Marikamba temple. She is exactly where we were going.”
“Sometimes we lock the doors of our past to fly free, only to realize we didn’t conquer the sky, we just caged our own roots.”
Author’s Note: To feel more connected to the story, play your favorite emotional song while reading the next chapter, or queue up Kadalanu to set the mood.
Chapter Five: The Faded Ink
“Have you ever prayed so desperately for a miracle that when it finally stands in front of you, you forget how to believe?”
The drive from my ancestral house to the Sirsi Marikamba temple was a complete blur. The heavy rain had finally stopped, leaving behind a crisp, washed-clean evening. It felt poetic, in a way just like all my sins and heavy karma getting washed off by the monsoon before I finally went to stand in front of God.
When we reached the temple grounds, the air was thick and mist-like. It was the perfect reflection of my own mind over the last 342 days clouded, suffocating, and lacking any clarity.
“Look near the steps,” Meera whispered, killing the engine.
I pushed the car door open and stepped out. I looked past the massive stone pillars, my eyes scanning the wide steps leading up to the main deity.
And then, I saw her.
As soon as my eyes landed on her frail figure, a heavy temple bell rang out in the background, its deep chime vibrating through the wet earth. Time completely paused.
Sitting on the second step, leaning against a cold stone pillar, was a frail woman. She had grown terribly weak, her collarbones showing through her faded green cotton saree. What she had endured over the last 342 days to travel across the state and reach this temple, the hungry nights, the endless roads, the confusion was a heartbreaking, untold story I would never know.
But despite the physical toll, that innate charm, that quiet, pure lovingness she carried, had not faded one bit. Her silver hair was tied back in a loose bun, and that small, maroon bindi sat just a millimeter off-center on her forehead. She was softly clapping her hands together, staring blankly at the wet courtyard, humming a tune that was practically embedded in my DNA.
“Baanigondu yelle yelle ide… Ninnasegelli kone ide…”
I didn’t walk. I ran. I sprinted across the wet stone courtyard like a small, terrified lost kid who had finally spotted his mother in a crowded village fair.
I dropped to my knees right in front of her on the hard stone steps. I reached out with trembling hands and gently grabbed her cold, wrinkled fingers. I lowered my head, burying my face into her lap. I cried like I had never cried in my entire life, my tears soaking into the fabric of her saree.
“Amma… Amma, I’m here,” I sobbed, my voice breaking. “I’m so sorry. I am so, so sorry. I came. Let’s go home, Amma. Let’s go home.”
I waited for the familiar weight of her hand on my head. I waited for her to call me ‘kanda’, to scold me for taking so long, to tell me everything was going to be okay.
But her hands didn’t move. They remained completely limp in mine.
Slowly, the silence stretched. The humming stopped.
I lifted my tear-streaked face and looked up at her. Amma was staring down at me. But the eyes looking back at me weren’t the eyes of a mother who had just found her lost son.
They were completely empty.
She gently pulled her hands out of my grip. She adjusted her saree pallu, tilting her head with a soft, innocent curiosity.
“Neenyaru?” she asked, her voice quiet and polite. “Yen bek nimge?” (Who are you? What do you want?)
The words hit me with the force of a speeding train. The world around me shattered into a million pieces. The temple bells, the smell of camphor, the rain it all vanished, leaving me entirely alone in a terrifying, deafening vacuum.
“Amma…” I whispered, my lips shaking in absolute horror. “It’s me… Vihar. Your son. Amma, please…”
She just gave me a small, apologetic smile and looked away, turning her gaze back to the empty courtyard, and quietly started humming her song again. She was remembering the soil, the temple, and the music of her roots.
But Alzheimer’s had completely washed away her memory of me.
Suddenly, every annoyance I had felt back in my apartment rushed back to choke me. The repeated questions with the food plates, the terrified, lost look in her eyes while holding that hot brass cup… she wasn’t trying to irritate me. Her mind had been slowly drowning, reaching out for a lifeline, and I had simply put on my noise-canceling headphones and shut her out.
When I was a little boy, I must have asked her the same silly questions a hundred times a day, and she never once got irritated. She had answered me with infinite, calm patience every single time. But when her mind started fading, when she needed that exact same patience from me, I couldn’t even give her ten minutes. I failed to notice the smallest signs. I had completely failed her as a son.
I knelt there on the cold stone, paralyzed by the most devastating truth a human being can ever face. She was my entire world, and I had spent my life building a world around her but looking into her empty eyes, I realized I didn’t even exist in her world anymore.
For years, she had sat in my apartment, desperately wanting to talk to me, and I had ignored her because I thought I had all the time in the world. I had spent 342 days searching the earth for my mother, only to finally find her and realize that my memory was completely dead in her mind. I had reached her in time physically, but mentally, I was too late. I found the mother I had been searching for, but the soul that knew me, the soul that loved me, was gone forever. And that realization would haunt me for the rest of my life.
I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. It was Meera. She knelt down beside me, tears quietly falling down her own cheeks, witnessing the exact moment my heart finally broke beyond repair.
Vihar was a bird who soared too high on the wings of his own ambition, entirely losing himself in a demanding career while forgetting the sanctuary that gave him life. A bird can fly as high as the sky allows, but it should never forget that it must always come back to the same Vana (forest) to rest in peace. When we are so blindly lost in building our tomorrow, we often forget to hold onto the people we have today.
Theme art by ✍️,
Anjana Vijay https://instagram.com/anjana_vijay?utm_medium=copy_link
Story by ✍️,
S S SRUJAN GOWDA https://instagram.com/user__not._.available?utm_medium=copy_link








